So What's Next?

For my family and friends who are not as familiar with the adoption world as I have become in the last 3 years here is a little run down on what is next for us.

We have been assigned our family coordinator with our agency and she has hooked us up with all our check lists and guidelines for putting our dossier together. This stage is called the paper chase and can take anywhere from  4-6 months...our goal is to have this completed and turned in by Garrett's birthday August 3rd.

dos·si·er

ˈdôsēˌā,ˈdäs-/

noun

1. 1.

   a collection of documents about a particular person, event, or subject.

   
   

   
   

While simultaneously working on our dossier we will be going through a home study. We have our first meeting with our social worker on Monday, we will meet with her 3 times, one time in our home. The sooner we can get our home study done the sooner we can get our dossier complete as we can not apply for our   1-600A without it  (Application for Advance Processing of Orphan Petition).

There are a lot of new words in here for some of you and it sounds intense. I won't lie, it is. We have ordered birth certificates, marriage licenses, requested letters from our employers and references, scheduled our physicals and lab work, filled out paperwork for background checks, ordered online training and I have said lots and lots of prayers over these binders that have become a big part of my life. Everything will have to be notarized/certified/checked and double checked, we will make a billion copies and then send off all originals.

We are trying to take it all one day at a time, one item at a time but most times I go to bed thinking I could have gotten more done today.

We are hoping we won't have to do a lot of fundraising although we might do something fun here soon for those who want to get involved a little bit. We hope to do most of the saving and apply for grants on our own but it's going to mean a shift in life style for a little bit as big checks loooom over our heads for the time being. I am trying to give away this biggest anxiety to the Lord because I know he will provide and he will make a way.

So for now please pray for us and our family as we keep chugging along and by all means please let us know if you have any questions, we love talking about this new journey we are on and want you all to be as much a part of it as you want!

It looks different for everyone

Have you heard of IF:Gathering?? I had not heard of it until last weekend when it was popping up all over my feeds...instagram, twitter, facebook, you name it. This conference was VIRAL and what a fantastic message to have swarming the interwebs.

I found late Sunday that it had been live streaming all weekend...whoops missed it but luckily it was going to stay posted for a couple days and man did I devour my computer screen.  I will say Jennie Allen and Rebekah Lyons spoke straight to my heart through that screen, God put these amazing words in their mouth that I had heard before but not ever really heard...know what I mean?

The message lit something inside me, the message about equipping our generation of women to be free and run our race. To give each other the freedom to be human and to admit our brokenness and our mistakes without judgment but instead with love and  understanding. The message that this race that we are running, this calling we feel it looks and feels different for everyone.

Not many people understand my desire to adopt a child of a different race and culture or to travel to these third world countries and love on babies and the poor who live there...you know I don't really get it either it's just there on my heart. You know what's cool? Just because it's on my heart doesn't mean you are less for it not being on your heart. Maybe your calling looks like a homeless shelter in the inner city, maybe it's being a Sunday school or VBS teacher, maybe it's holding book/food/clothing drives, maybe it's advocating for trafficking or maybe it's fighting to end hunger or puppy mills. Whatever your calling is whatever is on your heart GOD put it there. He put it there for a reason don't ignore it, be proud and just live it.

I heard this during one of the sessions and it hit home so hard for me "It doesn't look like stages, books or adoption for everyone." I read a lot of blogs, I watch these women become authors, speakers, humanitarians traveling on blogging trips and I feel totally inadequate to them. I don't have the money to do that, I have 2 small kids who need me at home, I can't put a proper sentence structure together, I have like 2 blog followers. What am I supposed to do?? Where do I belong??

I belong here at home, folding laundry, wiping butts, doing crafts for the valentines day party and filling out a whole freaking lot of paperwork for an adoption that has me shaking in my boots and ready to throw up. My time will come when I can travel more and who knows what God will bring me to in the next 2, 5, 10 years down the road if I just let him work through me. Maybe I will end up on a Sole Hope trip (for now I have a shoe cutting party) maybe I end up leading a mission trip (for now I pray and go when I can)

I know this is all over the place but what I am getting at is this...women lets not judge each other because our hearts look different, our callings are different, lets embrace each other, love each other and encourage each other in our races.

BIG NEWS... It Is time!!

I have been waiting for a long time to share this news...3 years to be exact :) We actually made this announcement before. Before a bouncy baby boy with blonde curls and blue eyes entered our world, before our baby started preschool and became a little girl, before we moved out of our tiny house and into our new home.

Here it is...

from

Ethiopia

The picture Lydia is holding has been in our house for years, we have been praying for direction, we've been saving like mad and we had a financial goal we needed to meet before we could LEAP. We had our sweet Garrett and I could not be happier that we waited because he makes our lives better, the wait times are longer now and things are always uncertain in an international adoption (any adoption for that matter) but we finally knew it was time when we hit our goal after Christmas.  We know God has a plan for our family, a plan for this process, for the wait for the uncertainty that still remains all we know is that it was time to take the first step. So we have signed with our agency, we have received our family coordinator and our first set of direction into the "Paper Chase".

We know there are tons of questions and I love to talk about it and for now my head is swimming with all that needs to be done in the next 4-6 months in getting our dossier ready but all I know is that 3 years ago a piece of my heart was pulled to a country I have never been to and was aching for a baby that I knew I wouldn't carry in my belly but in my heart. 

They are excited!! 

Ahhh Garrett's face is the ultimate!!

Also Lydia never takes the hat off except for bedtime and school, thank you Sheriff Callie and snow days!

The Winter that won't go away

So this winter has been nuts, completely crazy and unlike anything I have witnessed or at least remember in my almost 29 years of life. Snow after snow and cold cold temps as in negative degrees multiple days in a row. Our poor furnace has not had a break in almost a month. Just once again makes me really really happy that we are in this house with a 2 year old furnace as opposed to the 22 year old furnace in our old house. 

I love a good snow don't get me wrong, I love that when it is snowing it gets so quiet and the snow seems to keep you warm. Lydia could sled for hours on our hill and it's so much fun. So right now as we are stuck inside with massively cold temps I will remember these first days of winter with fluffy snow and hours of fun!

Reflecting on 2013

2013 as I mentioned in this post at the beginning of the year, brought about a lot of change/excitement/adventure for me and our little family. I think it's important to reflect on where you've been in order to allow yourself to move forward.

Our year started out with some heart break, it sucked quite frankly. We had to say goodbye to our sweet B after only 4 years with him. He was the best and no dog we bring into this family can fill his shoes but we did end 2013 by adding another Golden boy who needed a home, we welcomed Harry and I think him and B would have been buds.

We then bought a house after walking through it one time...we just knew this was the one for us and the God ordained moments to get us to where we are at now is nothing short of miraculous in it's own way. We sold our house before it even went on the market, we live down the street from our family who also happens to be our babysitters/lifesavers. We have had the most snow this winter that I can ever remember and we have a massive sledding hill in our front yard perfect for making memories.

Our little girl turned 3 and we got to celebrate by hosting our first birthday at the new house! She started preschool and is on her 2nd season with dance class.

Matt and I went on the vacation of our dreams to celebrate 5 years of marriage and doing life together as a couple. I am so looking forward to what the next 5 brings, I love him more everyday and am so thankful I said YES 6 years ago when he asked me to marry him.

I left my job and took a new job with the kennel that I grew up working at, it is 1.8 miles from my house and has given me so much time with my kids. It felt like going home, like they are my family and it's where I am supposed to be. It really has been one of the biggest gifts of this year.

Our little guy turned 1 and starting walking and sleeping through the night...although that would be nice if he could start doing that again :)

I traveled to Haiti with my sister and Visiting Orphans, getting to experience what life is like outside of my little comfort zone. It sparked something inside of me, the desire to bring my love for orphan care ministry and for serving others into this house and to our community. To share these stories and pictures with my children so they grow up knowing what goes on outside our neighborhood, outside our country and outside of our "normal" life. I want to spark something inside my kids, something that will give them a desire to be world changers, to live for the one who has given us all we are blessed with and to share that with others.

We hosted our first Christmas and opened our doors to friends and family, already allowing this home to be so much more than just a roof over our heads but a place to live life together and make memories.

My heart is so full after this last year, it feels ready to settle into this new place we are in but at the same time I don't want to get to comfortable, I want to be ready to jump up and scream YES if we feel called to make changes or make big leaps.

Thank you 2013...Welcome 2014 Let's Do This!

Christmas Recap In the House

We are slowly coming up for air, out of the blur and fog of hosting friends and family for holiday meals, drinks and game nights. Our holiday was full of love, chaos, laughter, tears, snot, late nights, marathons of Muppet Christmas Carol, early mornings, snot and did I mention snot??

Through all the sleep depervation that comes with sick kids, the constant med giving, nose wiping, and cuddles that only mom can give we were able to feel so loved and blessed. When I look back at the holidays this year I just feel really really grateful and thankful for all those that God has put in my life. Not just our family but our friends, good friends who were in town and loved our kids and us so well.

Some "always" moments, things that we "always" do and still did this year were:

- Christmas at the zoo with my parents, they buy our membership for us every year and as a thank you and a fun way to celebrate the holidays with them we take them to Christmas at the zoo with us. It was a HIT and almost 50 degrees out which was awesome.

- We attended the annual viewing of It's a Wonderful Life with Matt's family.

- Christmas Eve at my Grandma's, the last one in her current home, the home we've been celebrating in for 20 some years, it's bittersweet but I am so happy she is moving just down the street from us.

 - Christmas morning breakfast at our house with my family. I love that my mom brings breakfast and we get to spend the morning with them. It's so special having my parents and sister and brother here with us.

New this year was that we actually hosted Christmas Day, it was exhausting but so good for the kids. They didn't have to leave the house or their pj's! Another new occurance this year, the stand mixer that has been hiding for 5 years, I got it out 3 times this Christmas season!! My husband is a happy man :)

I also don't want to forget the message I heard on Christmas Eve this year (my sister in law stayed with our kids so we could go and not have to wrestle sick kids at 10 pm, best gift ever!)

As believers we need to take Christmas as a breath of fresh air, a fresh start. This world is weary and we are weary with all that life throws at us but as believers we need to remember to be a people of HOPE. We have HOPE because of Jesus!

**side note, Garrett is not a paci kid he only uses it at night but poor guy was so sick, so we will forever remember the year Garrett was not feeling himself and wouldn't let us take it out of his mouth for pictures, pretty sure I need to burn that one!

Snow Fall

Today was our first snowfall...it still makes me giddy. I love that Matt sets his alarm early so he can start shoveling and have the driveway cleared for us to head to work. I even love that I get to be out in the snow at my new job. I love that Lydia was bouncing off the walls so ready to go play as soon as I walked in the door.

We bundled up while Garrett was sleeping and headed outside for just a little bit. She made snow angels, I pulled and pushed her down our fantastic snow sledding hill enough times to wear her out and burn a few calories for me. We let Layla out to run and play in it with us and she chased us down the hill on our bright purple sled.

We came in and made hot chocolate, her first hot chocolate, she counted the marshmallows even asking me to help her with math as she added a few more to her cup.

Something about this morning made this holiday season seem real. It's been weird being in a new house for Christmas, my decorations don't feel the same and we can't put lights on our roof because Matt would never survive it. It's been different and weird but today it felt real. I slowed down to play with my kid and watch the snow fall out our window with my little guy from his favorite seat in the house.

I want to focus on all that has been good in our lives this year and this house is one of those things, different isn't bad it's no cause for a funk but I let it put me there a little bit, different means change and change is good and we are all family under this roof and that's all that matters.