This is it...

Well, this is it, the last week as a family of 3. The last week that my girl will be an only child and the last week that she won't have to share all of those closest to her. I do not worry about my love for this new baby (we've had plenty of time to bond over the last 9+ months) but I worry about Lydia's little world and what is happening to it come Friday.

My prayer lately over and over again has been that God will prepare her little heart for all that being a big sister means, for now it means sharing mommy and daddy, sharing her doggies, sharing her mamaw's and papaw's and aunts and uncle. I know she will adapt and eventually she will not really remember a time without her brother or sister.

The last 27 months have been such an amazing time for Matt and I as we learned to become parents, more than just partners in life with a house, expenses, and jobs but parents with a little life that has depended on us for everything.

Lydia has been such a blessing and continues to prove to me that we are right where we are meant to be, I will shed a few tears for the change our life is about to take but they will soon be replaced with tears of joy and thankfulness that we get to do this all over again, just adding to the love and craziness in our home.

To my girl, know you are so much more than I could ever have imagined God blessing me with in a daughter and I cannot wait to see you love on your baby brother or sister in just a few short days.

All photo's from Kevin Monahan Photography

Fish

Lydia has become quite the little fish this summer, she started out having to hold our hands while swimming/being dragged around by us with her little swim jacket on. Then next thing we know she is off kicking and swimming by herself with her swim jacket on. Now she wants to jump off the diving board and off the side of the pool to me or her daddy.

Being way pregnant this summer I pretty much just float around the pool and she swims with her daddy while he throws her in the air, spins her in circles and helps her jump off the side.

Looking forward to many more fun filled summer weekends at Mamaw and Papaw's pool.

35 Weeks

35 Weeks...4 to go.

I would be lying if I said this part of pregnancy is easy because it's actually really really hard. The baby is sitting in my ribs so my right side hurts probably 90% of the day, I can't breath...it feels like I was holding my breath under water for a really long time and then took a gulp of air, my belly feels so tight sometimes I swear this baby is just going to kick right through it, I have heartburn like woah and I can't really sleep between the rib pain and constant peeing.

I feel like a pretty crappy mom these days too, thank goodness for Netflix for kids because Lydia gets to watch a lot more variety of tv this way. She has become a complete daddy's girl because well mom sucks and I sit on the couch or watch from my raft or step in the pool, no swinging her around or throwing her up in the air for me. I hope she realizes how much I miss doing that stuff with her. 

All that to say, I am thankful for this blessing and miracle of pregnancy. I'm hoping to make it the full 4 weeks to my scheduled c-section date and then kiss the face off this sweet little peanut that has me wishing for 2 a.m. feedings and pacing to whatever late night tv is on.

InstaFriday: Nursery Sneak Peeks Edition

Linking up to InstaFriday today again but this time with some sneak peeks at the nursery progress, it's almost done and I will reveal more once we get the rug that just got shipped!

Awesome and totally comfortable recliner, glider, rocker that my parents bought us for the nursery!

my attempt at modge podge, they look really cute up on the wall

Our dresser that we found on craigslist and my hubby refinished

curtain panel

crib and bedding

Nerves

For those of you who are new to my little corner of the web as in you were not reading when I had Lydia over 2 years ago now (holy moly) then you won't quite understand why I am getting nervous with 4 weeks to go until our little one arrives.

My delivery/recovery from having Lydia was not what anyone would consider ideal. It was actually pretty scary and messy.

Read more Here, Here and Here.

I love that our bodies somehow blur that out and make you think that you can do it all over again although now that we are only weeks out I am second guessing a bit why I thought I was ready to go through with this again.

I talked with my doctor over a year ago when we were thinking of trying again and asked how we could do this differently, how we could make this not as dramatic and awful as last time. She suggested scheduling and planning it with her. That way we are guaranteed to have her as my dr., I won't push for 2 hours subjecting my body to a higher risk of infection and we will have an OR that is ready for me. This should help the whole infection and no progress in the pushing department.

However, now I am undergoing routine blood work to watch my platelet levels because they are low and dropping. Ok big deal until I Google exactly what platelets do and truth is they are important little boogers. They will help keep me from bleeding after a C-section. Baby totally not at risk, such a relief everything is looking good and on schedule in that area. BUT now I'm nervous, like really nervous to do this all again. To plop my butt up on that operating table and let them operate while I'm awake waiting for the words "It's a …." Praying that my body does what it was made to do and that the platelets work their booties off to make sure I stop bleeding.

If you are the praying type, please pray that my levels stay right around where they are now, no dropping anymore so I don't have to see a specialist and I don't have to move up my delivery date. That it all just stays as planned, that my nerves that are skyrocketing through my body right now will be for nothing.

That a month from today on August 3rd I will be holding my baby in a hospital room with family surrounding us.